Category: Family

Surviving An Eclipse

I remember my mother’s matter of fact voice as she quoted Robert Burns to me:

“The best laid schemes o’ Mice an’ Men

Gang aft agley,

An’ lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain,

For promis’d joy!”

My usual words to myself are “When Life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” But, these words usually come to me later, after my initial anger at the thwarting of my well laid plans. I am still learning how to muddle my way through disappointment. Recently, my significant other and I embarked on a long anticipated vacation. Well, Life events eclipsed my plans…or in this case it was Death (more about that later). I thought I would share some things I learned during the recent thwarting.

When the normal 20 minute drive to the airport takes more than 3 hours through unusual routes and gridlocked traffic:

  • Enjoy learning how to take the toll road the long, long, way around town to the airport. And be glad that you are driving and that your cell phone savvy spouse is navigating.
  • Be happy you are not alone. You have someone to talk to in your car. You have a radio to tell you that you are in a traffic jam and what caused the jam. Everyone else on the road is with you, a bonding experience with your sister and fellow travelers.
  • Be grateful for drivers that let you merge when your lane ends. Don’t curse too much at the ones cutting you off. And pat yourself on the back for pushing your way in front of other cars when needed, and for letting others move in front of you. No one is getting anywhere fast anyway.
  • Enjoy learning about the neighborhoods that you usually speed past without seeing. There are taquerias, tire repair shops, and convenience stores with bathrooms for a needed pee break during this long commute. And again, be thankful for the car that lets you back onto the road after the pee break.
  • Take advantage of the slow, slog to bird watch as you move only 6 feet every 2 minutes past an undeveloped field. There is time to dig out the binoculars and watch hawks hunting, little sparrows foraging in the grass, and a shrike at the top of a tree. You can focus on Nature and calm your “I am going to miss my flight!” agitation. Pretend you are one of the Monarch butterflies fluttering over the freeway towards the airport.
  • Admire the gumption of the young travelers wheeling their suitcases the last mile and a half to the terminal after ditching their ride shares.

When you finally get to your car park and are on the shuttle to the terminal:

  • Enjoy competing with the other riders in one-upping each other in how long the commute took.
  • Enjoy your shuttle driver telling you that this hours long road shutdown is not as bad as the 8 hour road shutdown that happened a few months ago.

Once you get to the airport terminal:

  • Once again, enjoy bonding with the thousands of other people who missed their flights and with whom you will be in line with for at least the next hour.
  • Be proud you asserted yourself when a woman with an angry face cuts in line in front of you. She will back off and yell at you, “Well, move it then!” She will not apologize. A sister passenger in line supports you in your assertiveness and points out that the angry face attempted line cutter is wearing an airline uniform. “They are supposed to be courteous!” she says in a British accent. Be thankful you didn’t miss an international flight like the sister passenger did. Don’t report the angry face lady to the airline she represents. After all, she missed her flight too. You have that bond.
  • Enjoy people watching. There are people from all walks of life and nationalities and most of them are being civil to each other. Smile at the antics of the bored little kids in line and be glad that you are not trying to get out of town with a family of 6.
  • When you get a flight that leaves 7 hours later and will get you to your destination after midnight, enjoy more people watching and maybe a really good sandwich (airport prices be damned!). And be thankful that you and your traveling companion find a place to sit down. At your age, sitting on the floor like the younger travelers might be an option, but getting up off the floor will be much harder.
  • Accept that not all plans work out. Let go of trying to continue on despite your exhaustion.
  • Be thankful that it is just your trip that has been snuffed out and not your life. The roads had been closed and traffic rerouted because a person on a motorcycle died in a collision that morning, before sunrise.

(Eclipse photo was a screen shot from an online live stream of the October 14, 2023 solar eclipse over Albuquerque, New Mexico from NASA)

(Poem excerpt from To a Mouse by Robert Burns; from wwwlpoetryfoundation.org)

Teach Your Children Well

( semi Woke ramblings from an old White lady)

I love trees and love to write about trees, but I have not written about one tree that I have spent years learning about…my Family Tree. My ancestors lives were filled with triumph and tragedy, joy and sorrow. They were products of genetics and of the times they were born into. I take no pride in their accomplishments nor do I apologize for their faults.

Trees (oil on cardboard by Barbara Block Downes, my mother)

My paternal grandmother, Mary, loved me and I loved her. She was born into a large family and had lots of funny stories about her siblings and other relations. Sometimes a story would be told about her grandfather and others that related to Civil War days. My brother and I would ask her if her family had owned slaves back then. My memory is that she would change the subject, that she didn’t want to discuss this. But, I just took it for granted that these landowning farmers in rural Louisiana were slave owners.

Relatives on both sides of my family have researched our genealogical lines and I have lots of information. My tree is full of names and dates, with a few short sketchy details of their lives. But, I wanted to learn more about who all these names were as people. This became especially important to me after my parents died. The more I researched my family history, the more I felt connected to all those that came before.

My grandmother Mary and some of her other female relatives documented the ancestors back to Revolutionary War times. She was a proud DAR member and gave my brother and I copies of her DAR documents and brief histories of her family. There were gaps in the information about some of the people and I set about filling in the gaps. Besides a few trips to places my ancestors lived, I have mostly done online research. I have learned much from old newspapers and other documents. The census records are interesting and easily accessible online. They have given me a clearer picture of the people I came from.

In the 1860 U. S. Census for Franklin County, Louisiana (taken in August 1860), her grandfather (my great great grandfather), William Buie, is shown to be 39 years old and living with his wife and 3 children and 3 unrelated people. One of his children was 7 year old Henry H. Buie, my great grandfather. William’s occupation is farmer. His real estate was listed as worth $15,400 and his personal property being worth $1,715.

This led to me checking the U. S. Slave Schedules of 1850 and 1860. My people were well represented in these records and were not hard to find. This validated my suspicions that many on my grandmother Mary’s side were slave owners. But, I also was unprepared for my emotional reaction as I read through the records for the first time. It is one thing to have an abstract idea that “Yes, my ancestors probably owned slaves.” I did the search in the records for William Buie and a record popped up on my computer screen…Yay! I found him! Then I read on…a long list of humans with no names, only sex and age listed. I cried. There were 17 souls listed as enslaved ranging in age from 35 years down to a 1 year old (including twin 6 year old boys).

Partial list of the 17 enslaved people listed as owned by my great great grandfather

Now, imagine you are a descendant of these nameless people and you want to know who they were. This is an almost impossible task. However, some documents (wills, bills of sale, runaway slave ads) contain the names of the enslaved. There is a collaborative project called Beyond Kin, where family historians can upload and share documents. So, if I find a document about my White ancestors that has the names of the enslaved, I can share this with Black and Mixed race people doing their own genealogical research.

Soapbox: The more I hear people putting down “Woke” culture, the angrier I get. The opposite of woke is asleep. Being asleep can be a great escape from the nastiness that humans inflict on one another…but, living in a dream world does not make the world better and it doesn’t make us better as people.

I am a bit more awake after seeing these records of my family and I see with different eyes. I don’t feel guilty coming from these people. I do not apologize for them. I have gotten more interested in History.

Some people are upset about our children learning some parts of our history. I say we should let kids look at these records (and other documents) and then challenge them to think about what they are reading. The way history was taught to me in school was boring. Names of presidents and dates of battles and yada, yada, yada…If I had been taught in a different way…learning about the people as real people I could relate to, I would have learned so much more. White kids looking at Slave Schedules does not have to lead to them feeling guilt because they are White. But, perhaps it could lead them to a better understanding of why their Black peers can not “Just get over it.”

“The past is never dead. It’s not even past.”- William Faulkner

“No matter how difficult and painful it may be, nothing sounds as good to the soul as the truth.”- Martha Beck

*According to one historical source William was against secession because he did not think the South would win. He did not serve as a soldier. (From “Boeuf Prairie Methodist Church- A History -The Church- The People- The Community-1833-2008”)

Check out:

BeyondKin.org

and

Enslaved.org

It’s a Bird! It’s a Plane!

It is a July morning, the only good time to sit outside when we are experiencing 100 and 100 plus temperatures. We sit out in our backyard sipping coffee. The breeze is pleasant, rustling the leaves in the burr oak above us. There is a bright, blue sky with fluffy, white clouds, drifting and shifting shape.

I have my binoculars close by, and my eyes scan the sky above our roof. My husband’s eyes are glued to the news on his Ipad.

Two people. Alike and not alike.

“Look! A Mississippi Kite!” I point at the soaring grey bird, it’s white head helping me identify it. My husband looks up briefly.

We both hear a far off engine noise. He taps and scrolls and says, “That is a Gulf Stream 4 private jet flying from Cabo San Lucas to Austin.” We look up and see the plane heading east. My husband has an app on his Ipad that shows a photo of the plane, the name of the plane, and the route it is taking.

“A White Egret…it is flying east too,” I declare, as I follow it with my binoculars.

“DC-9-15 (F) USA Jet Airlines heading from San Antonio to Detroit at 29,000 feet.” We watch it head north until the tree obscures our view.

Flying things in the sky. Alike. And not alike.

My eyes spot swallows flitting about up high. I can’t identify them.

“Boeing 737-79P. Southwest Airlines from Austin to Denver.”

A black chinned hummingbird zooms past us. As I follow it, I spot another Mississippi Kite. “Oh look, honey! Did you see it?”

“Yes, that was a Piper PA-46-350P Malibu Mirage…a private prop plane…going from Houston to Ruidoso at 24,000 feet.”

I guess we see what we want to see sometimes…

*(Sky and plane photos by B. McCreary)

April Bathing

Have you ever bathed with family or a dear friend? I had the privilege of bathing with both recently. No, I am not talking about bathing in a tub or a shower. I am talking about Nature bathing, taking long, slow walks outside. Some call it forest bathing. I say it can also be called prairie bathing, riparian bathing, or desert bathing.

In early April I enjoyed such an outing at McKinney Falls State Park, which is on the outskirts of Austin. My husband and our daughter and I had a great time meandering along the creek looking at wildflowers (which are at their peak in early April here), bird watching, and even fish watching. Here are some photos:

Redbud Tree and Bluebonnets

Pink Evening Primrose (Oenothera speciosa)

Cypress Tree Trunk On Onion Creek

Cormorants Convening

Fish In Onion Creek (unknown species)

Towards the end of April a dear friend invited me to go bird watching with her in the same park. Some different plants were now blooming. We saw snowy egrets, great blue herons, and more cormorants flying up and down the creek. Other than birdwatching, we had no agenda. We just walked and enjoyed the fresh Spring air on our skin. The sounds of many different birds teased our ears, from the screeching of red tailed hawks to the sweet songs of cardinals. There was also the recurrent chirping of frogs. We stopped to admire and smell flowers. I enjoyed touching leaves to feel their texture. Here are a few photos from that walk:

White Clover (Trifolium repens)

False Gromwell (Onosmodium bejariense)

Prairie Larkspur (Delphinium carolinianum ssp. penardii)

Scarlet Leatherflower (Clematis texensis)

We did not talk about world affairs or gossip about people or our troubles. We talked about nature, that before us, and old encounters. And we met others enjoying the natural wonders of this park. There were the girls from a nature school laughing and having fun while processing yucca leaves into cordage. And a couple visiting from Israel led us to a view of a barred owl up in a cypress tree.

These times nature bathing with others both relaxed and renewed me. Get out there, somewhere green, and just be. Oh, and don’t forget friends and family. Invite someone outside to bathe with you.

Here is a link to more info on McKinney Falls State Park: https://tpwd.texas.gov/state-parks/mckinney-falls

Plant information from A Field Guide to Wildflowers Trees and Shrubs of Texas (Texas Monthly Field Guide Series) and Wildflowers of the Texas Hill Country by Marshall Enquist

Photos by B. McCreary (who is also responsible for any misidentification of plants)

Natural Associations

I have written about certain plants that reminded me of family members (purple spiderworts for my Mom and madrone trees for my Dad). Deciding to follow this line of thought, I made a list of family members and friends. Next to each name I wrote the name of a bird or birds that I most associated with them. For example: Daddy- vultures, ducks, pigeons. My Dad got a kick out of telling a story about a neighborhood boy who lay out on a driveway, motionless, trying to attract vultures. And, when my daughter was young, my dad would enjoy going to Zilker Park with us to feed the ducks and pigeons.

My Dad Feeding The Pigeons

Next to the name of a very dear friend I wrote crows, because of her many recent crow encounters. I also wrote cartoon birds because she draws whimsical birds.

Whimsical Birds Courtesy Of A. B.

My next list was mammals and quite a few people had dog or cat next to their names. Some were more specific, such as hunting dogs for my Grandfather Johnnie and chihuahuas for my Great Grandmother Tee.

Great Grandmother Tee with Palsry, Neva, and Big Shot (1934)

I started a new list, Reptiles and Amphibians. I have not completed that one yet. And I started a list of categories: plants, trees, flowers, insects, fish, rocks, fossils, geographic features, and constellations. I tend to enjoy associations with the natural world. But, the possibilities are endless. It might be fun to see what kind of music or books or cars or art you associate with friends and family. This could be a fun icebreaker at a get together. Or ask people what animal they associate with themselves. It may be very different from what others associate with them.

Have fun with this!